I don't know what's going on but I've been very snappy and short-tempered nowadays. My level of perfectionism and going-by-the-book-ness has reached the maximum point and one tiny, itty bitty thing that doesn't go according to plan sets me off like an atomic bomb.

I hate when things don't go according to plan and there isn't a bloody backup plan when things don't go as expected. I hate feeling like a lost puppy searching for its owner whenever there isn't a plan, or a rule, to follow. I hate it so much that it can easily ruin my mood for the whole day. I don't know why but I hate it.

I always thought that all this while I actually have at least someone I can talk to, here in university. Someone who wouldn't mind accompanying me to wherever it is I wanna go around campus. But. Yeah. You know how it ends.

I shouldn't feel so bummed because I'm so used to doing things on my own but most of the time I feel really awkward whenever I'm all by myself. And I don't want creepy guys approaching me just because they 'want to get to know me'. It happened last night while I was having dinner with my roommate and it was so awkward, especially since I was caught in such an awkward position (slurping my noodles and chewing them at the same time) and all the while I was thinking 'Oh please someone save me!" My roommate who was sitting next to me could only keep quiet because it was just so, SO awkward.

I guess the fact that I keep seeing everyone with at least a friend or two accompanying them just leaves me feeling really awkward and, as much as I hate to admit it, lonely. Back in school I didn't mind being all by myself all the time but I don't know why it's the opposite now that I'm in university.

I'm really not in my best shape today and I have a lot of errands to run. I'm supposed to get my midterm results today but I can't, unless I have a passport picture of myself, which I have yet to have ever since I started wearing hijab; and also a copy of my SPM result slip, which is at home. I dont know why they need my freaking SPM result slip to take my midterm results. Other groups didn't have to bring a copy of their SPM result slip! Ridiculous.

Ah yes. Did I mention? Ridicule sets me off, too.

I have errands to run but I have this Archiweek event going on at the Faculty of Built Environment today at 2pm and I'm not sure if I'm going. I need to rush home to get a copy of my stupid SPM result slip and I need to drive all the way to section 14 to get my passport picture done just for the sake of getting my midterm results. Parking at Section 14 is gonna be a bitch. I really dont want to go alone because I don't feel it is safe but then again I doubt anyone would want to accompany me today. Fine. I'll be the lone wolf today.

Argghhh days like this I just feel like going back home and see my whole family.

I'm impatient. So sue me.