Iman Nedhiera

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Intensely passionate about photography and other artsy fartsy farts. An avid nature-lover. Highly obsessed with sunny afternoons and evenings, funky-looking clouds, and sunsets. Deeply infatuated with all things old, vintage, and kitschy. Highly sentimental. An enthusiast in baking, photography, and music :)


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Sunday, June 29
11:51 PM

I just got back from KL Convention Center. I watched the Beauty and the Beast Broadway Musical with Kak Intan, Kak Lea, and Abg Ike. It was my first Broadway Musical ever! Haha.

I enjoyed the performance, but quite disappointed. First; we got the loser seats. It means that we had to crane our necks to see the stage. And second; we found out that the casts were lip-syncing, bummer man! But overall, I'd give it a 6/10. Luckily we got the cheaper seats. If not I would've been screaming in rage!

We left the house at around 6pm to pick up the tickets. After that we went to Burger King at KLCC. As usual, I'd order my all-time favourite Fried Mozzarella Cheesesticks. I also bought a Vienna&Cheese Pie from King Pie outside Burger King. It tasted so good -- even though the pastry is very crumbly.

Well, I enjoyed my day. It was a cloudy and cool day. It wasn't an unbearably hot sunny day. Yeah.

Me. Barn.

So, how are you and your new "baby"?
Yeah yeah, we're good. Still organising my playlists though, it's so complicated!
Ahah, right. So eh, who's gonna be the "mummy"?
Ah, not sure. Still searching. Haha.
Oh please.

Haha, Barn Barn. The I'm-Iman-Nedhiera's-cool-brother xD



Saturday, June 28
10:06 PM

I just got home from KLIA about an hour ago. I followed my parents to drop off my brother at the airport.

It was 2pm, we were about to leave the house to eat lunch at a restaurant in Bangsar. So we ate our lunches and then we went to Bangsar Village.

It was 3pm, we were at Coffee Bean at Bangsar Village II. I ordered for myself a regular ice-blended vanilla with caramel drizzles, while Barnzola ordered a large Blackforest for himself and a large ice-blended strawberry for Mama and Abah.

If I get an iPod kan, that is IF la, I'll give you my PSP.
Oh my God! Are you serious?
Yep, but take care of my baby!
Oh please, haha.

After going to coffee been, we went to an authorised iPod dealer at Bangsar Village. I had no clue that Barn was gonna buy himself a silver 5GB iPod Nano. I thought he was just browsing. So then, after I've been through almost every item in the store, I found out that my brother got himself an iPod. I stood there in shock. He was the first family member to actually buy an iPod for himself. Oh, this is so going to Kakcik's knowledge, AHA!

Now that I actually got an iPod, you can take my PSP.
Ooohh, awesomeness! Thanks brothah!
Yeah, but use it smartly lah. Don't just use it to play that fighting game, haha.
Will do.
Oh, and put it back in the bag after you're done using it. Jangan bagi calar la, hehe.
Ye, okay Barn, I promise.

Yes, he actually gave me his PSP, now that he has his iPod -- or as he would call it, his Baby. Luckily his PSP is black in colour, hehe. It's like a token of him, now that he's not at home but in Miri. I'll keep my promise in keeping his PSP safe, and using it wisely.

My brother and I were really messing with brand names and what not. We actually switched the first letters of anything that has two words so that it'd sound very funny. Like Baskin Robbins, it became Raskin Bobbins. It was hilarious! We kept going on and on and on about it until we arrived at home. Anything that we saw, we'd switch the first letters. But, the funniest thing my brother cooked up was, Dapini. It was originally PADINI, but he switched it to DAPINI. It was hilarious, it make me choke on my drink! There were countless first-letter-switchings that we made, hahaha. Haih, good times :)

We dropped Barnzola off at the airport at around 7.30pm. Well, we arrived there at 7.30. After that, we went to McDonald's to have dinner. I ordered myself a Spicy Chicken Wrap, which actually tasted good -- and new? Then I drank half a large Coke, which filled me with gas and made me burp. *BURRRPPPPPPP

It was already 8.15pm, we had to leave. Barn's flight would take off at 8.40pm, and he needed to board the plane already. We said our goodbyes, had our kisses, and left.

I really enjoyed my brother being at home again. It's like there's life in this home again. I miss my brother already. It'll take about a few days for me to get over it :(




12:59 PM

My brother is going back to Miri tonight :'( Noooooooooo!

It's been two days since Kakcik left for Aussie. She'll be back home on Wednesday night, the night I seriously can't wait for! I hope she'll buy me that wool jacket I wanted, hehe.

I'm very hungry. Maybe I'll eat that Maggi Hot Cup in the cabinet later. There's no lunch today. My housekeeper didn't cook anything since there are only three of us at home; me, my mom, and my housekeeper.

Miss Piggy is currently annoying the hell out of me. Seriously, my hatred for her never ends. And I mean never!

Last night I showed my brother the video of Peanut and Jeff Dunham. He was laughing like mad! Click the link below to watch the video, by the way. Be prepared to laugh laugh laugh!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQm_8vX3sYU

I'm hungry. It's time for me to fill my tummy with something.



Friday, June 27
9:06 PM

MY BROTHER IS HOMEEEEE...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAAAAYYYY!

Fun's over, he's going back to Miri tomorrow. Shites. He'll be taking the last flight tomorrow, God knows what time. He arrived at home this morning. Abah fetched him from KL Central. After that, we went to Raju's to have breakfast. That's when I bumped into Wawin there. hehe. Turns out, Wawin just arrived at Raju's with her parents just when we were about to leave. I didn't recognise her until she called my name. hehe.

Mood : In physical pain.
Dinner : A scoop of rice with kacang panjang gulai lemak and fried prawn smothered in turmeric. Ooohhh!

Dinner was great. Seafood mania bebeh! Fried prawns and fried crabs smothered in turmeric were on the menu for tonight's dinner. Oooohhhh. . .

Iman! Bye!
Bye *Senyum kambing*
Eh, what's wrong? You look like as if you're in a bad mood.
Nothing *Senyum kambing lagi*
Are you sure?
Yeeeeeee. *About to leave*
I'll call you tonight.
*Ignore*

I'm sorry, dear. I really am sorry. I was in such a bad mood at that time. I owe you.

I'm really tired. I'm loving the presence of my brother at home. Yay! It's so good to hear his voice, to talk to him in person. Aahhh, good times.



Thursday, June 26
10:03 PM

I woke up at 5.30am this morning. I found myself shivering in the early morning in my sister's room. The lights were already on by then, and there she was, getting ready to leave for the airport. As I showered, that's when I thought, Wow, today is going to be a looooong day.

I followed Abah and Kak Lea to drop off Kakcik at KLIA this morning. We left the house at 6.15am. Kakcik was going to Aussie. Well, she's in Aussie now, probably having fun there ;) I left the house with an empty stomach. It was rumbling all the while. As soon as we got to the airport, we went to McDonald's. I fixed myself to some Sausage McMuffin with Egg and a cup of hot steaming Milo. That was all I needed, and it made me full.

By 8am, Kakcik had to transmit to the terminal and we had to go home. We said our goodbyes, not satisfied. We arrived at home around 9am, that's when I started to get ready for school.

Abah brought me to the clinic before going to school. I had some unknown insect bites at my feet, which kept on bursting out some sort of liquid. It's really itchy. Unfortunately we had to wait for too long at the clinic, so we left and Abah sent me to school.

I was in no mood after dropping of Kakcik this morning. I didn't feel like talking to anyone.

I was exhausted and sleepy after cheer practice today. I didn't get enough sleep last night. I only slept for four hours, which is not enough.

My being sleepy at school after recess freaked out some people. haha. Somehow, whenever I get sleepy, I tend to get hyper and high. After Science class (which was after recess), I couldn't stop laughing all the way. I seriously had no idea why. I just kept on laughing. Even when my friends didn't do anything, I'd laugh uncontrollably. ahaaa.

I'm very sleepy now. I think I'm going to sleep very soon. My homeworks are done, Alhamdulillah! Sleeeeeeeep, zzzzzz.

I miss Kakcik already :'(



Wednesday, June 25
10:20 PM

Kakcik. Me.

Doppy, why aren't you in the kitchen?
No. . .I don't want to witness. . .Abah killing. . .the crabs!
Haha, so dramatic la.
Haha, whatever.
Wow, I can't believe I'm leaving for Aussie tomorrow!
I can't believe you're going to Aussie,
again!
I know! Well, actually I'm not in the mood to go to Aussie tomorrow.
Then why did you choose to go?
Well, I had to. It's compulsory that I go along.

Bye bye, sis! We'll miss you! hehe, padahal, tujuh hari je kat Aussie. Well, I wish you good luck for the mooting in Aussie, sis :)

Kakcik is going to Aussie, again. No fair! Well, this time, she's going to Perth. The previous visit, she went to Melbourne for some mooting thingy. Now she's going for another one. Wow, she is no doubt going to be a successful and professional lawyer. And hey, lawyers get lots of cha-chings okay!

Bye bye sis, we'll miss you!

Oh I'm so going to KLIA with my family at 6am tomorrow. We're dropping off Kakcik. Ahaaa bam!

Abah and Mama got home with two bags of live crabs, which scared me half to death. The sight of the crabs moving their claws in the plastic bags were disturbing. Eeegghhhh o.O



9:21 PM

I wasn't in the mood today, na'uh.

Abg Azlan came for dinner today. I think we're going to play Scrabble with Kakcik later, yeah yeah.

The itches at my feet are terribly disturbing and annoying. They are seriously disturbing. Not just at my feet; my arm, my chin, my tummy, my thighs! It came a few weeks back. I told my dad, he said maybe it was ants. But then when I told my sisters, they said it might be the early symptoms of measles. Nooooo! No no no no no! Cheer comp is in two weeks, and I can't be sick! NOOOOOOOO! Maybe I'll beg my parents to take me to the doctor. Better safe than sorry.

My Ujian Bulanan Dua is in about two weeks. So is cheer comp. Ah, big clash there. Cheer comp's on July 12th and 13th, while the test starts on the 7th for a few days. Such a wrong time for tests. I hate tests, I hate exams! Grrhhhh, they're so stressful.



Tuesday, June 24
10:03 PM

I'm hurt, deeply hurt.

I love you, I really do. But sometimes, you make me go berserk. Sometimes I feel like choking you to death, but you have this terribly adorable innocent face that stops me from doing so. No matter how much you hurt me, I still care for you. But do you care for me, like before? I don't think so. If not, prove it then.

I'm saying that you've changed. . .a LOT. I'm not sure if you realise this, but no matter what, I'll still care for you. You know me, loving to help people in various situations.

When I talk to you about my problems, it's like talking to a toddler. You just listen and tell me to relax and what not. It's frustrating, because you're not helping me. While I on the other hand, I help you, a LOT. You just didn't realise it. When I tell you my problems, it means that I need advice and help. Not just a young toddler telling me to chill.

Nowadays, the only way I can release my tension on you is to be mean towards you. I'm sorry. I'm just hurt, and this is the only way I can make you realise what you did that hurt me so much. Please, just say the things that you mean to say. Don't make up lies for me just to make me feel loved and cared. I don't like lies, I only like the truth, no matter how hurtful the truth is. I can't stand another lie.

I don't know any other way to describe this. I hope you really know who you are. I hope it's clear that you're the one who hurt me, the one who made me so depressed like it's nobody's business. I sayang you okay.

***

Well, on the bright side, I heard that my brother is coming home! Well, visiting only. My dad told me he might be coming home sometime this week, or maybe next week. I really hope he does. I miss him so much -- which by the way, I'm sure he's gonna shower me with a thousand kisses when he gets home xP

As I got in the car when I'm going home from school today. . .

Abah. Me.

Eh, kenapa dengan siku Iman? Tumbuk kawan ke tadi?
Oh, ha'ah, tadi Adik tumbuk kawan. Tak injured pon.
Wah, bagus bagus! Iman kuat!

Ha-ha, very funny Dad. Well no, obviously my dad knows that I made up the part when I said I punched a friend. HAHA, instead, I told him, "Oh, tak, ni masa cheer tadi Adik pakai the bandage for support on the arm je," Yeah. He thought I was injured because I was wearing a bandage around my elbow. Yeah, it was for support. Although, it would feel so good to punch that rotten fruit with my elbow, HAHA talk about satisfaction. Rotten Fruit stole my dignity >:(

My brother's coming home! Weeeeeeeee!



Monday, June 23
10:58 PM

Ah, today was a good day. I wasn't even moody :)

Cheer prac was awesome! We finally progressed, yeah!

Today during PJK, we got to play! Finally, the Mumbling Ultimatron 3000 is letting us play. Woohoo! Well I had fun, haha. I managed to kick Lyna and Qiela's butts, HAHAHA ;D

After PJK was a drag. I hated the five minutes after PJK. That was when Ms. N came to our class for some reason. She was all. . .

Girls, why is your class so noisy? Kamu tahu kan markah midterm kamu teruk, lagi nak cakap-cakap benda yang bukan-bukan ye. Kamu ni, degil ha. Tak mau dengar cakap. Dah tahu kamu punya markah teruk, buat lah ulang kaji! PMR berapa bulan je lagi dari sekarang. Boleh lagi kamu chat dengan kawan pasal benda yang bukan-bukan. Saya sudah nasihat kamu, kamu tak nak dengar!. . .

And blah blah BLAH! Eh hello! We know our marks are not so good, not so excellent like other classes but hey, DON'T RUB IT IN OUR FACES, for God's sake! Well, her pessimist attitude is so darn annoying, it makes me wanna kick her flat ass. Seriously, what kind of teacher puts that pessimist act on his/her students? Obviously the students will feel crushed! Oh, why I oughtta. . .! Really, she definitely ruined my good mood. She is such a pessimist! Ha, put that pessimist 'tude on us again, all you'll get is a chuckle of annoyance. Pfft. How do you expect your students to work harder if you say they're not gonna succeed and that their marks are really bad and there's no way you can improve unless you study your ass off? I mean, seriously! Ugh, looks like I'll have to face her during KH tomorrow. Maybe I'll do that trick again; cover my face with the big and heavy text book. That way she won't know if I'll be rolling my eyes or sleeping, HAHAHA.

Well, if that's what she thinks about my class, then fine! See if we care. We don't even want to listen to you advising us with something that we already know, something that our parents taught us. Sheesh! She thinks we're so stupid, like as if we have no brains. Pfft, look who's talking. Grrrhhhh, I seriously enjoyed last week. Why? Because she was away for some course! HA-HA, it was fun while it lasted. And today, during the first assembly, oh she annoyed the shit out of me, man. She was all, kamu semua tak pandai nak diam ke? Tak pandai nak duduk diam ke? and BLAHBLAHBLAAAHHHHH all the way. Fish fish fish fish fork!

Well, apart from Ms. N rubbing the fact that my class is so naughty and what not into our faces, my day went well, yeah :)

The misery is gone. My misery is gone. I'm now happy. I'm not depressed anymore. I'm cheerful, and hyper. Somehow, my problems just faded away. They're not important to me anyway. So, I'm happy happy happy :)



9:30 AM

It's 9.30am, I'm supposed to be leaving for school in about an hour, I'm still not showered, still haven't eaten and still haven't packed my bag. Oh yeah, this is the life! Beware peeps, Speedy Iman has arrived!


Aha, thanks for this picture Wawin ;)

Gah, I'm bored. I seriously need to off this stupid laptop and go shower. hihi x)



Sunday, June 22
12:54 PM

I need to earn RM100, pronto.

Full stop.



11:31 AM

Oh my God, I'm so hungry! I haven't eaten anything since I woke up. My tummy is making a sound, telling me to stuff it with something delicious. Somehow, it gives me a wave of nausea, damn it! I heard we're eating a dory fish for lunch today, oh I'm so in the mood for Fish and Chips!

From tomorrow onwards, cheer practices are extended, HOORAY! It will now be from 11am until 3.30pm, awesomeness! Still, with all that practices during P&P, I must learn to cope up with my lessons. Hey, I can do that, no hal!

The terribly itchy ant bites at my feet are still not gone. Instead, they keep on bursting and keep secreting out some kind of clear liquid, yelgh. It's so itchy! I can't stop scratching it for even two minutes. Maybe I'll apply Vaseline later.

I'm seriously looking for a new shampoo. The shampoo that I'm using now -- which is Sunsilk Smooth and Silky -- left me some kind of residue on my hair. Well, at the center point of where my hair starts to grow. I don't know what the residue is. But what I know is, it's very annoying. It is sticky, somewhat like a hairgel. Any suggestions, anyone? I need a shampoo that can cleanse my scalp and not leave it oily, one that obviously removes that stupid residue on my hair, and one that has a so-darn-good smell that lingers on your hair for a very long time. Well, my hair has enough moisture that it needs, I just need a shampoo that can remove the residue (and make my hair smell so darn good!)

As of right now, I'm using Feather. It definitely removes the residue, but it makes my hair oily. It's like I have to wash it everyday, and I don't like it. I wash my hair every two days. I only wash my hair everyday when I have sports.

Okay, my tummy is seriously hammering the walls of my stomach. I need to eat. Maybe a quick bite will do.



Saturday, June 21
11:00 AM

I recently looked at this girl's pictures. Oh my God, I felt nauseous just looking at it, literally! She has issues man. . . She looks like a corpse, but a fat one, HAHA I'm so mean.

My lower back and my thighs are killing me. My lower back is aching because I did too many cartwheels yesterday, haha. My thigh muscles are sore, really sore. It's hard for me to walk, go up and down the stairs, sit down cross-legged, etcetera.

I can't wait for tonight, yay!

Well, nothing much to update.

Chowzers! -- By the way, "Chowzers" is pronounced as ciao-zurs -- Aha aha aha!



Friday, June 20
9:10 PM

I cried today, again.

This day had been another wreck.

There I was, perched in front of my closet as I got home from school. I was still in my school pinafore. I leaned against the door of my closet, my legs folded. Then the tears came. Not to say I'm emo, but things have been getting to me and it's really frustrating and stressful. So today, I cried, again.

From quiet sniffs to heavy sobs, I just cried my way through the hurt and anger. My head was throbbing again from the many thoughts in my head, my eyes red and puffy. I let the tears dribble down my cheeks, not bothering the salty taste as it got in my mouth. I just cried, and cried, and cried.

After minutes of crying, I finally settled down. I decided to get up and be prepared to take a shower. That's when the SMS came. *jeng jeng jeng* As I read the SMS, I broke down into heavy tears. My sobs were louder and heavier, occasionally taking deep and short breaths. I sat down quietly. This time, I sat on the floor with my face buried in my duvet. More tears were spurting out of my eyes, wetting the cream-coloured duvet.

I lifted my head from the duvet and I sat in a yoga pose. I tried to meditate, which made me cry even more. That's when I gave myself two cold and hard slaps on my cheeks. Cry cry cry. . .*slap!* sniff sniff, cry cry cry *slap!* stop. The sting on my cheeks got me. It made me feel stronger and somehow empowered. So I got up and took a shower.

The shower was relaxing, as usual. The smell of coconut and yogurt were calming and relaxing. They lingered in my nostrils as I showered. The coconut smell from my body wash, and the yogurt scent from my shampoo. Yeah, that was no doubt relaxing.

The ant bites on my feet are disturbingly annoying. I can't stop scratching them. They are so itchy, it made me wanna kill the ants that bit me. So I decided to change my duvet.

Wawin, please tell me. . .How come these bad things usually happen to people like us?
Well, it's because we're nice. Apparently people don't appreciate what people do for them.
True.

Appreciation is all I'm asking for. I love to help people and I don't mind sacrificing the time I have for the people I love. I do feel enjoyed when I help people. I'm not asking for anything in return, just a hint of appreciation would be satisfying.

Wawin's right. People don't appreciate what other people do for them. Kan Wawin kan?



Thursday, June 19
8:57 PM

I've been crying for the past three days. I've got major problems to be solved, to be dealt with. I am so stressed at the moment. This week has been such a total wreck.

I got involved in a fight with a close friend today for some ridiculous reason. I wasn't alone. My heart was raging mad when she ignored us -- definition of us : me and another friend. I was so angry and mad when we were being ignored. But, I told myself that I'm a sane and calm person. I managed to not scream.

I am very stressed. This is the worst week of my life. I hate this!

I got home at around 8pm today. I left the school around 6.45pm. The weather was rainy, the temperature was very cold. My palms were cold as ice, and I could feel the goosebumps rising on my legs. As I got in the car, the air-cond was blasting. I was freezing like mad.

My head started to throb as the cold hit me. Millions of thoughts juggled in my mind, one after another. I was hit by a wave of nausea, followed by more head-throbbing. So I slept in the car. Unfortunately my head throbbed so much, I couldn't even sleep. The radio was blasting, with the boring news on.

I was relieved when I got home. I didn't bother saying a word to anyone at home. I went straight to my room, locked it, and showered. I enjoyed the moment as I stood under the shower, with the warm water running down my hair and my body. It was no doubt relaxing. After I shampooed and conditioned my hair, my hair smelt better than ever. I felt fresh and awake.

I am loaded with homeworks today. I had to catch up from yesterday's work since I was absent. And plus, I have to cope up with today's homework. Well, I'm not complaining. Doing homework actually gives me more knowledge, which is good.

I am just so stressed. I don't know what else to do, who else to go to. Wawin was absent from school today. It was soooooo the wrong time for her to be absent. I kinda missed her, heh heh. Seriously, she was the person I really needed to talk to. I wanted to tell her about my raging mad problems, but she was absent. Haih :(

Well, this is just another phase that a regular teenager has to go through. Maybe it'll be complete before I even know it.

I guess I have to off now. Homeworks are piling up.

Chowzers.



Wednesday, June 18
3:45 PM

I was in so much pain at school earlier today. The pain was unbearable!

The clock struck 11.30am. I was in the hall with my cheerleading team. We were done stretching and warming up, we were just about to do the routine.

Unfortunately, my stomachache was unbearably painful! I couldn't stand up, let alone walk and run. Even when I'm sitting down, I couldn't stay still. I would shift from another position to another position to avoid discomfort of my tummy. I wanted to cry, and so I did. But, I cried silently.

I thought the pain would last for a few minutes only, unfortunately it didn't. I was afraid to admit to myself that the pain won't go away. This is because earlier this morning, after I had my breakfast, I had a tummy ache. It usually happens because my tummy just woke up. But when I got to school, the pain came back. It didn't go away. Well, it did when I was jogging. But after I jogged and stretched and warmed up, the pain came back.

So during the cheer practice, I just sat down with discomfort. My stomach was very painful, it hurt so much. Then I just couldn't take the pain anymore, so I went to the bilik sakit. I asked my friend to get me minyak angin because I seriously couldn't do anything. So my friend did what I asked and I applied the minyak angin on my stomach. It had no effects. It didn't do anything except giving a cool-feeling on my stomach. While I was lying down on the bed in the bilik sakit, I hugged my knees tight to my chest. Still no use.

There were a group of three girls outside the bilik sakit, they were kinda stalking me, I think. It's like they knew that I entered the bilik sakit, and they went in to see me and they greeted me -- heck, I don't even know them HAHA. Since sitting in the bilik sakit was no use, I got out. Outside the bilik sakit, the girls were still there. They said "hi" to me but I ignored. I was in pain, an unbearable pain, and I was in no mood for "hellos" or whatever. They were lucky I didn't snap and shout at them. My stomach was too painful for me to even talk. The tummy ache even gave me a bitter taste in my mouth, yelgh. Like the taste in your mouth after you wake up from sleep, HAHA.

So I went to the canteen and sat with a few of my friends. I wanted to go home. The pain was killing me. So they escorted me to the public phone and called my dad. I couldn't stand anymore, so I went back to the canteen to sit. But unfortunately, the canteen was filled. So I went into the hall and I sat there. My friends returned to me. They said that my dad will be at school in about 30-45 minutes. Alhamdulillah.

After a few minutes, I went back to the canteen with my friends. I waited for my dad there. At that point, I couldn't take the pain anymore. All the while I had been crying silently, but this time, I cried my heart out. From sniffs to heavy sobs, I cried in pain. Then more and more of my friends came to comfort me -- thanks guys, I appreciate it a lot! :)) Still, they could do nothing else to ease the horrible pain. While I cried, they tried to cheer me up but it was no use at all. They asked me how I felt, I didn't even bother to answer them. Instead, I just shook my head and cry even more. The only words I said were "I want to go home!". I enjoyed their company even though I was in so much pain. I don't think I've cried very hard at school before. This is like the first time. I was crying like a baby, sobbing like there was no air to breathe, while the pain in my stomach kept rumbling and killing. I cried until I had no tears left.

After about half an hour, my dad arrived. I was glad, but still in pain. So then I went home, my sobs quieting down. The pain was still unbearable. I needed to go to the toilet, badly. I didn't feel nauseous, but I felt really uncomfortable. So when I got home, I didn't bother to get my things in the car and I just dashed into the bathroom. After I did my job -- heh heh -- the pain finally cooled down. I was in pain no more.



Tuesday, June 17
10:06 PM

I am struggling.

Just struggling, I can't live with this.

I want to hide under a rock.

I want to cry my heart out.

I want to crawl back into my mummy's womb, wishing I was never born.

I can't live with this.

I want to scream.



8:24 PM

Nothing to update.

Just boring stuffs.

I'm very tired and exhausted.

Lately I've been eating so little for the day. I only eat a small breakfast in the morning and a small dinner at night. And during recess at school, I would only drink chocolate milk or orange juice and/or eat something so little just to fill my tummy. I haven't had the appetite to eat even though I'm hungry. Usually a few bites would fill me up.

This week is very depressing and stressful. I have problems here and there and I can't deal with them alone. I need someone by my side. I need someone to talk to. I need someone that I can go to so that I can cry my heart out. I am very depressed. Everything is changing, everyone is changing, moving on with their lives and not bothering about the past.

Long story short, I'm currently depressed, stressed out, and exhausted. Tonight for dinner, I only ate a scoop of rice with sup daging and broccolis. I didn't really have the appetite, and I was hungry. But after a few bites, I got full already.

Mood : Indescribable.
What I'm wearing : Red sweatpants and white tee.
Hunger : Full.

The end thank you.



Monday, June 16
9:51 PM

I'm sad, I'm lost, I'm confused and I'm stressed.

Can my life get any worse than this?

Grrhhh one problem here, another hurtful thing there, it all sums up to a fekkin' stressful life.

The end.



8:37 PM

There I was, standing stark naked under the shower. I let the warm water run through my hair, slowly streaming down my body. I let the metaphoric pain, hurt, and stress drain gradually. The feeling of the warm water on my bare skin felt like nothing else matters. It felt like a spa. It cooled me down, it made me feel a little more relaxed. Ooh yeah, it was relaxing alright.

I'm very motivated and optimistic at the moment. People are saying, Ooh Adele won't make it in the top fifteen this year, Adele won't win anything, Adele sucks but Xavier rocks and what not. Some people take this as a threat. They take it as a harsh statement for them to fail. Well, I don't take it as a harsh statement. I take it as a motivation for me to work harder to prove that Adele isn't just a junior back-up team, but a team that is doing this for glory. I'm serious. I take it as a motivation. I'm going to work harder. I want to prove to people that we are the best.

I hanged out with Wawin and Piqa after recess today. Sara and Kar Mun were busy with their choral speaking, unfortunately. So I sat with Wawin and Piqa in the class.

I expressed my feelings to Wawin. And somehow, she is going through the same thing as me. She understands me like no one else. She's been in my shoes. It feels so great to have a friend who is so understanding, who is great at listening to you while you babble on about your problems. Seriously, I'm so thankful to have a friend like Wawin :) I love you! Haha.

That's all for the day. I guess you can say my day is okay.



Sunday, June 15
3:59 PM

Today is 15th June 2008; Father's Day. I just got back from Pavilion with my family.

I woke up at 10am today. Late late, grrrhhh! I quickly got ready for today's Sunday Brunch. After I showered, I was in panic because I didn't know what to wear. At first, I decided to wear a white polo with jeans, not working. After I rummaged through my closet searching for something nice, I gave up. So in the end, I wore my grey Levi's long-sleeve tee. I rolled up the sleeves up to my elbow. Phew!

Left the house at 11.15am. Kinda late for a "brunch", hehe. Kak Lea had me to hold her Nikon D70S, she said I could hold it and snap pictures. And so I did. I started snapping pictures in the car, haha. So all this while, I was holding the camera. I hung it around my neck. The annoying thing is, it kept on bouncing on my flat tummy when I walk, HAHA :P Hey, it's quite painful okay.

We ate at The Loaf. We had a reserved table for six. Oh my God, The Loaf is soooooo good! I'd give it a 10/10! The surroundings look like as if we're in a wedding. It was pretty and very beautiful. The food's great too! One portion can feed two people. So I shared with Kak Intan a Reuben Sandwich. It's this huge piece of bread topped with beef bacon, some sauce, and some Gruyere cheese -- the cheese was drop dead great! Here's what I ate. . .



Yeah bebeh!

After the late brunch or early lunch, we walked around Pavilion. Thank God I didn't bump into anyone I know, heh heh. We went to Times bookstore -- my family and I are book lovers :D
So I searched for a book at the teens section. The variety of books there pretty great. It's unlike MPH, Times bookstore has really great selections of books. Since I couldn't resist myself, I decided to buy a book that costs RM34.90. I think it's worth the money, because the book is heavy and the pages are those glossy kind of papers you find in magazines. I think that book is my first glossy-paged book, haha.

Snap snap snap. There I go again, snapping pictures of random objects at random angles. I actually snapped 235 pictures! Coolio! I was very impressed with my work of photography, even Kak Lea was amazed. haha. Well unfortunately, I won't post the pictures here since there are many of them and they are very big. So, why not you check them out at my MySpace? :)

After that, we went home. I really enjoyed Pavilion. This is like the first REAL family outing since ages! I really had a great time :)

Phew, I'm exhausted. Later I'm going to my aunt's house. hehe. My favourite aunt, hahaaa.

Abah got a really comfortable office chair for his birthday and Father's Day. He also got a pedometer, that tracks down how many steps he takes a day. haha. Neat toy! Wee I love today.

Chowzers!



Saturday, June 14
12:45 PM

Hello! I've decided to pick a new design for my blog. I'm getting bored of the old one, hehe. I hope you like it! -- New layout, same blog ;)

Okay, I seriously can't remember what happened last night after I fell asleep. It scared me and made me wonder how it happened.

So here's my story. Last night I was stressed, it was already after midnight. So I went to my room, locked my door, turned on the air-cond, turned on the radio and turned on the lights. So my air-cond was on, and at the same time the fan was on too. Then I read my book on my bed. I was starting to feel a bit light-headed so I decided to take a short nap. And so I did. I still remembered the position I was in during that time. I was lying on my side, and I was holding the book in my hand. That's when I dozed off.

The next thing I knew when I woke up today, I was in a different position, and everything was different. The air-cond was off, and so was the radio. The switch for the air-cond on my wall was also switched off. My lights were off too. I was lying on my back and the comforter didn't cover my bare legs -- I was wearing shorts -- I woke up in confusion. The weird thing is, my bedroom door was open. My book was next to my pillow, but the bookmark wasn't in the book. So then I SMSed my sister, assuming that she went into my room and did it. She said she didn't. Uh-oh. . .

I remembered that I locked my bedroom door. No one could've possibly went in since the door was locked. My sister said maybe I was the one who switched off everything, just that I didn't realise it. That could be true. I mean come on, I was sleepy. Who's alert when they're sleepy?

Well, what's past is the past.

I think tonight we're having a family dinner somewhere. We're going to celebrate Abah's birthday and Father's day -- even though Father's day is tomorrow -- Well, I can't wait!

Abah is out for the afternoon. My sisters are out too. My mum is not at home, she's in Taiping. My brother is in Miri -- as usual. So it's just me and my housekeeper at home. Abah left me ten bucks to spend on lunch. Woohoo! Well, since I can't drive YET, Abah said I could order McDonald's for lunch. Double Woohoo! If I'm going to order McDonald's, I won't order the fries. McD's fries can lead to breast cancer, since it has so many preservatives. I know this from a research. hehe. Maybe I'll just order chicken nuggets, yeah that could work.



Friday, June 13
11:48 PM

I am completely stressed out. CURRENTLY completely stressed out. I have no mood to talk to anyone. I have no mood to do anything. I just want to lock myself in my room and stay there like it's nobody business.

Gaaaaahhh I'm so stressed out man. Meditating so doesn't work for me. It only brings me back the stress and paranoia.

I am stressed. I don't think I've ever been this stressed before. Well maybe I have, but very seldom, it's like once in a blue moon.

I don't like thissss! I really don't mind if my problems show up one by one, one after another. But I really hate it if suddenly numerous of problems come attacking me all at once, eating me alive silently. Seriously. This whole stress thing is just a pack of absurd problems altogether.

One pressure here, one problem there, another pressure here, another problem there and vice versa, and hey presto, the big ball of stress is back. I'm currently being attacked by a big ball of stress. Yeah, I guess you could call it that.

Serious shit I'm telling you, I don't like 2008! 2008 is a fucked up mashed potato. It's nothing compared to 2007. This year is not what I had imagined. I don't like going through teenage life. I wish I could just skip this part and be a full grown up in a blink of an eye. I wish I don't have to go through these problems anymore. Aarrggghhhh!

I am such a pessimist right now. Everything is falling apart and the last thing I need right now is words of torture.

Dear 2008, you've been such a cruel and absurd year so far. I don't like you. You are as shitty as the shittiest shit in the whole wide world. The end, Goodbye, Thank you.



5:32 PM

Today is Abah's birthday. He's turning 58. Oh my God! He's turning 58! The big five-eight. In two more years, he'll be sixty. I'll be sixteen. Whoah!

Oh oh I was the first one who wished my dad! Happy! :)))

I wished him when I was on my way to school in the morning. hehe. Tonight we're not going to celebrate, since not everyone is at home. Instead, Abah, Kakcik and I will go to Midvalley tonight for dinner. Ooh the food court! Definition of heaven; the chicken rice at the Food Junction. Hell yeah!

I think we'll celebrate tomorrow, not sure where. I'm currently missing my mum's presence at home. She went to Kampar, wherever that is. Good thing is, she'll be back tomorrow! Yay!

I've got another good news, and a bad news. Good news is; I didn't fail any subject for my midterm exams! Woohoo! Bad news; my marks are lower. Well, I am happy that I didn't fail any subject, but I'm also unhappy that my grades are lower than before. And to be honest, I think I'm one of the highest in my class. I aim to be in the top three, I hope I'll achieve that.

Chowzers!



3:23 PM

I am so mad and angry! I am so pissed today. I did a pretty good job at hiding it at school just now. This year's Sambutan Hari Guru wasn't as fun as last year's. The hall was even more crowded, the air was stuffy, and it was hot. We even had to sit so close to each other so that every CBNer can fit into the hall. We had to sit so close, there wasn't even a small gap in between. Obviously it made the environment very hot. I was practically sweating even though I was sitting under the fan.

I hate today. Even yesterday was a better day. Yesterday, I laughed even harder. Today, I didn't laugh so much. Just chuckles and giggles. Apart from laughing during the performances by the teachers, yeah.

I am effing pissed, annoyed, and frustrated. I can't believe that a person I love doesn't wish to support me. Argh geram!

Shit shit shittity shit! @#&*!!!!

And what the hell, my neck is God damn killing me! Argh geram lagiiiiiii!



Thursday, June 12
8:50 PM

Oh, today was hysterically hi-hi-hilarious! I've been laughing my guts out today. HAHAHAHAHA!

My day was balanced. A little stress here, a little pressure there, some happiness and laughter in between. I guess you can say it's balanced.

Cheer competition is in approximately three weeks. We have three weeks to practice. We were confronted by the seniors earlier today. Really, only then I just realised how much trouble we're in. I can really feel the pressure. Three weeks is like three days, a'huh. It's not so much time.

Today, Wawin and I went jalan-jalan-ing around the school during Geography, HAHA! Well, my teacher came in late, and we were bored. So we went walking and walking and walking. We went to the hall, then back to class. Hall, class. Hall, class. And that routine goes on for a few times, hahahaha.

Eh, Wawin, what should we say to cikgu if we come in late eh?
Ahh, dunno lah. Just cakap berak batu je.
HAHAHAHAHAHA! Constipation bebeh!

Wawin, Wawin, she always makes me laugh like crazy. Haha. After we merayau here and there, we went back to class. All hail Pn. Annusha, teacher of Geography of class 2T! She was in class already, doing her work. She did her work, and we did nothing. We didn't even belajar for Geography today. Woohoo! So instead, we did our own work.

I sat at the back of the class with Wawin, Piqa, Ammy, and Nani. Since our class is next to the jungle, we "watched" the jungle for monkeys! hahahahahaha it was hilarious! It was like as if there was a show of monkeys there, which apparently made us laugh our guts out.

Tomorrow is the annual CBN Teachers' Day Ceremony! Woohoo! All CBNers must come to school in the morning. I am so excited! I'll bring my camera tomorrow, with a permission letter that Pn. Lalitha signed today, hee hee.

Well, that's all I could remember for today. All I know is, my day has been great. 80% laughter, 20% stress. Oh hell yeah, today was great great great! I've been laughing and laughing and laughing, laughing like there's no tomorrow. Plus, it's good to laugh! You lose weight, heh heh.

"Hello! I am Lindsay Lohan!" Oh, I love Achmed the dead terrorist, ha ha ha ha ha!

Chowzers.



Wednesday, June 11
9:57 PM

I am currently hurt. I don't know what I did wrong, which I'm sure I did nothing wrong at all. Questions are tangled up in my head, asking me all sorts of things I couldn't answer. Headaches are attacking me frequently, which in the end it only gives me an upset tummy.

Everything has changed. . .

I won't share with you why I'm so hurt, deeply hurt. I can't stand the headaches, the upset tummy, the unanswerable questions rambling in my head anymore. I just can't. So far, I don't like 2008. I really miss 2007 and 2006. Nothing can ever replace the good memories I had in 2007 and 2006. So far, 2008 is a big whacked wreck. Mood swings attack me very frequently, which is resulting everyone to be afraid of me, sheesh.

It's taking up my time. . .

The last time I was so hurt like this, I drowned myself in self-pity. How pathetic. It was so funny, drenched in self-pity like there's no tomorrow. It makes me laugh as I think about it. But now, I'm very hurt. There's no knowing who had hurt me so bad, no. Only I know. You don't, and you never will. And no, I will NOT drown myself in another self-pity moment, it is just so lame and pathetic. Very loser-ish. I'll try my best to deal with it. I'm sure there are worse cases than this.

There's no going back. . .

Like I said, everything has changed. The questions are still fighting with each other in my head, rushing to be the first to be answered. I can't answer them. They are way too complicated and confusing. My head is spinning round and round, I'm seeing stars, my head is throbbing with pain.

Could this be any worse?



Tuesday, June 10
10:57 PM

By the way, yesterday's PJK bore-fest-yawning-spectacular is finished!

I started writing at around 9pm, and guess what time I finished? 2.00am. That's right, I finished writing the useless notes in 5 hours. Of course, I did take short breaks in between, just to get rid the painful feeling in my fingers.

In the end, it gave me blisters at my thumb. I've been writing so much for so long, and since the penS -- yes, I switched pens from time to time -- that I used had rubber grips, it gave me blisters. I couldn't write with pens without the rubber grip, because then it would make my middle finger very painful, since they put so much pressure on my finger.

I was too stressed out by the time I finished writing. I was just so stressed like you can never imagine. Heck, I don't think I've been that stressed out before. I didn't feel like talking, I didn't feel like slapping on a fake smile, I didn't feel like doing anything. I just wanted to stuff my ears with my earphones and just put on a relaxing song. That did the trick.

Seriously, I was so stressed. If you were to talk to me at that time, I'm sure I'd be biting you a long time ago. Last night after my work has finished, I nearly tripped over something in my room. But I didn't fall. Since I was stressed and my temper was at the maximum point, I kicked that thing, which in the end gave me a painful foot. Then I kicked it again, this time with my other foot, which in the end gave me another painful foot. So then I stopped, thinking that obviously it was no use.

So then, I just plugged in my earphones to my phone, and I put on a song I can relax to. Since a few hours before I drank a mug of Nescafe -- thinking I would stay up until 4am -- I couldn't sleep. So I just lied down on my bed until 3am, and eventually I fell asleep.

Which reminds me, I should be sleeping now. I'm very sleepy already. Yaaaawwwnnnn. . .



8:38 PM

I don't know, nothing much to update. I won't bore you with the details today, nothing interesting took place.

Well, I got my exam results already. I am very not impressed with them. I have no idea how in the world I can get a 78% for English. It is very unlike me. I've never gotten a 78 for my English, never! Usually I'd get 80++, but never below 80.

Well, my KH teacher was definitely boring me with kancing baju during KH. Yeah, we were learning about buttons on your clothes. I know, booooooring! I even hid my face behind my superiourly thick and big text book and I even closed my eyes from time to time. The good news is, she didn't even know that I was trying to sleep. I was so sleepy and tired, and I didn't need to be bored by KH.



Monday, June 9
11:12 PM

Wooohooooo! Even Mama thinks that copying down these useless PJK bore-fest-yawning-spectacular is NO USE! HAAAAAAAHA! Seriously, when I told her that I needed to copy down more than 100 pages of notes from the text book, she was all;

What? Kena salin nota?
Yea, Ma.
What's the use pon? You have the text book kan?
Yea, Ma. Adik pon tak tau.
Then why you salin the notes?
Dah cikgu tu suruh, kena la buat. Esok kena hantar.
Esok kena hantar? Banyak ke?
Ha'ah, banyak. More than hundred pages from the text-book kena salin. Macam la masuk exams pon.
Tsk tsk tsk. . .*sighs*

HA! I love you, Mama! She's on my side! Woohoo!



10:04 PM

Today is a wreck. Today is a whack. Today is like any other shitty school day. It's a whack wreck!

Okay, so my mood was cheerful and happy before recess. Hoho, after recess? My mood was immediately torn down by some teacher Piqa and I call, Cikgu CBB. I won't bore you with what CBB means, long story. Cikgu CBB --every time you read this Cikgu CBB part, do put on a really annoyed and sarcastic voice, thank you-- is our PJK teacher that we dislike. I mean, seriously, I don't think anyone in my classroom likes this teacher. All she does is mumble. Mumbling like there's no tomorrow.

So, what happened today during PJK was, almost three-quarters of the class were sent to the office to see Penyelia Petang, Pn. Lalitha. Why? Because some of us didn't complete our work, and some of us didn't bring our exercise books. So I plead guilty to both --heh heh, "plead guilty"-- Well hey, I wasn't the only one. There were like 23 of us who were sent to see Pn. Lalitha. Ha-ha, shameful.

I don't mind being sent to the office for a useless subject like PJK, seriously. I mean, come on! What exactly do you learn in PJK? Yeah, health and sports, blah blah dee blah blah. Hello, it's all about your commonsense and your general knowledge. Like why do you need to exercise? To burn fat and to stay fit. Seriously, do you still go over this in college? I don't think so. It's completely a waste of time. Even if there's still a subject like PJK, why not we do physical activities instead of theoretical stuff? It's so boring. It's a bore-fest. A yawn-spectacular. Sheesh.

Well actually, we were sent to the Meeting Room. That's where Pn. Lalitha came and talked to us. She was quite stern about this, so I took it seriously--after all, she is the best professional teacher around-- We blame Cikgu CBB. Just because she sent us to see Pn. Lalitha, an ancient school rule that was once abandoned, now came to life. And the school rule is. . . we have to finish our work at the corridor of our class. I can live with that. I just can't live with Cikgu CBB mumbling all the way like some kind of Mumbling Ultimatron 3000. She gets on my nerves! And just because of this mumbling teacher, we had to pass up our work tomorrow after the first assembly. And hey, you don't know how much work we got. We have to do NOTES--notes, what is the point of doing them if they don't get in your head and most of all, if they don't even exist in your exams?!--on a few loooooooooong and boring chapters. Again, it's the bore-fest-yawning-spectacular!

After that, we went back to class. Cikgu CBB gathered up her things and just left the class with no "Thank you" or whatever. Well, what is there to thank her for? For getting us in trouble? Yay! Thank you Cikgu CBB! Chyeah right. After that, Piqa and I went to our lockers which was at the other end of the school--just a figure of speech for a really long distance-- All the way from our class to the lockers, we thrashed about Cikgu CBB like crazy! We talked bad about her like there's no tomorrow. We were so God damn pissed at her.

When we were at the Meeting Room, I just felt like saying;

Pn. Lalitha, I'm sorry to say, but I don't like how Cikgu CBB teaches us. She bores me to death and I think this subject is useless. Thank you.

Oh that would be just great! Sadly I was a coward and I couldn't get those words out of my mouth. This Cikgu CBB bores me to death, seriously! Like we can even hear her talk in class. She mumbles. The Mumbling Ultimatron 3000! All hail The Mumbling Ultimatron 3000! Ha-ha, right. She even said that we were naughty and stubborn. In my head, "Jeez lady, baru tahu ke?" Oh she annoys the hell out of me.

We got our BM papers today. I'm not sure about my results, but I think it'll be okay. My paper two was unbelievable. I got 70/100 for Paper Two, and that's good news. As for my Paper One, it was such a disappointment. I got only a 25/40. I expected more than that. Stupid test-paper-marking-machine! I'm not sure which calculation I should follow. From the calculator--which apparently gets you the higher score-- or the calculation manually--which apparently gets you the lower score. I pick the calculation from the calculator.

I just did my PJK bore-fest-yawning-spectacular NOTES that apparently didn't transfer to my brain at all. I just wrote down whatever shit there were in the text book. I didn't care if my writing was as bad as vomiting, as long as the damn notes are in the exercise book. I just copied down notes that filled up nine pages of my exercise book. And trust me, that is not even a quarter of what I should be finished by tomorrow. And my writing is small, puny. Think about small writings in nine pages, that's a lot! I even had to drink a mug of Nescafe to keep me awake so that I can finish this thing and get it over with. The only thing it gave me was a headache. Ugh, my head is pounding now. I feel like my eyeballs are going to jump out of their eye sockets anytime now.

My fingers are sore already. I've been writing as fast as I could and the pen had put so much pressure on my middle finger--heh heh, middle finger, you know what I mean :P-- that I think there will be an internal bleeding in my finger. Ouch.

Isn't it awesome? Writing down pages and pages of boring notes that don't transmit to your brain, with your head pounding like crazy, and your fingers sore? Ah, this is the life, not.

Well, looks like I have to get back to the bore-fest-yawning-spectacular before I get into another trouble tomorrow. Thank you Cikgu CBB, for ruining my life. I really don't appreciate that. I wish you good luck for your contest in mumbling! I think you'd win, since you're the Mumbling Ultimatron 3000! Pfft.

I am so peeved. I need to lie down. My head is pounding even more. Hammers in my brain, ugh.



Sunday, June 8
10:33 PM

I am so frustrated. I'm just fekkin' frustrated. I don't know which path to go. I don't know which path leads to the better, and which leads to the worse. I don't know what to do!

Okay, I'll get my stories straight. I'm just frustrated. Why? Because people have been bothering me. Unknown people, bothering me, through SMS. I have absolutely NO IDEA where they got my number. And these people, are obviously boys. I don't know them, but they know me. I have no idea where they got my number. Therefore, they start texting me and bothering me. I know better than to reply them. So instead, I just deleted their messages.

I'm scared. I'm scared that bad things will happen to me. I'm so scared. I just want to crawl underneath my bed and stay there forever. I just want to crawl back to my mummy and just cry my heart out. I've been thinking of changing my number, but then I thought again, would it be worth it? I've been changing my number numerous of times, but they end up in the same situation; people knowing my number without my approval. So I thought again, if I change my number again, will it be worth my money?

I'm so scared. I don't know what to do. I'm clueless. This is when paranoia attacks me at its best. This is when fear starts eating me alive. This is when confusion hits me. I am confused, frustrated, worried, and worst of all, paranoid. I seriously don't want to list down the things that I'm afraid will happen to me.

No. I'm stronger than this. Nothing will ever bring me down. If I have to change my number, I'll do it for the sake of my safety. I'll sacrifice my money for my safety if I have to. Nothing is more important than my own safety. NOTHING. Even if I have to give up my MySpace account, I'll do it. Even if it means that I have to give up the internet, stop publishing pictures of me, and stop doing everything I'm not supposed to do on the internet. Maybe I'll still blog, but maybe I won't have my MySpace account anymore. I'll meet new people the old fashioned way. Let me be forgotten, unknown, anonymous, for the sake of my safety.

I'm really scared. It's not even my intention to put up these MySpace and Friendster accounts to flaunt what I've got. I just want to keep up with my old friends and new friends.

For the umpteenth time, I'm afraid and I'm scared. I need something to hold on, something that I can grip tightly, something that can prevent me from falling down, down into the blackness of nothing.

As for right now, I just want to cry my heart out. Let my eyes be sore and red, if it makes me feel better.



11:30 AM

So today is the last day of the midterm school holidays, oh joy. Somehow, I'm looking forward for school tomorrow. I got everything prepared already, haha :P

I was woken up by the sound of drilling *drrrrrrrrrr!* and the sound of hammers at around 9am. I couldn't stay awake immediately because I slept late last night. So I woke up around 10. Then I started cleaning my room.

The house is super noisy today. Lots of drilling and hammering going on. Ugh, this brings me back to 2006, when the house is noisier than this. The workers here are renovating our fishpond. They're gonna fix the piping, add a deck at one of the sides of the pond, and add a few more decorations. The fishes in the pond were transfered into a big bucket. Sadly, some of the fishes died, HAHA so long suckers! You fishies bore me >:D

Okay, I think I'm having a headache; the sound of the drilling, hammering, the TV, the music in my ears. Ooohhh. . .



Saturday, June 7
11:43 PM

I stand corrected, tonight's family dinner wasn't "formal" at all. It was just a casual dinner. Nothing fancy about it. We ate at Nong and Jimmy's at Ampang. Honestly, I didn't really like that restaurant. I mean, the food's great. But the place was quite dirty. And there were smoke everywhere. Smoke from the stalls, and smoke from smokers. I really didn't like that place.

I got home about nearly an hour ago. We celebrated Kak Intan's birthday. We had a small strawberry sponge cake --which tasted really good even though it's not so sweet-- and we sang the happy birthday song. The cake was so cute! It had big dollops of whipped cream on the top, and in between of the dollops, there were honey-coated strawberries! Yummm.

After the celebration, I went straight up to my bathroom to take a quick shower. I thought I would just rinse my body with water and wash my face. But as I got out of the shower, I could sniff the smell of smoke in my hair. Ugh, God knows what kind of germs lingered in my hair and my scalp, gross. So I skipped back into the shower, washed my hair, and shampooed it. Didn't condition it though, it didn't need conditioning.

Overall, I'd give that restaurant I went to just now a 4/10. The food's great, cleanliness poor.

Chowzers.



Friday, June 6
10:00 PM

I finally got the book that I wanted today; Shadow Web. When I first arrived at the teen-readers section at MPH at Midvalley today, I was immediately disappointed. The book wasn't there on the shelf. No no. It was only last week when I saw numerous copies of that book. I started looking again, making sure there's still at least one last copy of that book. There goes the searching. Bingo! I found it! The last copy of Shadow Web. There it was, the side of the book smiling at me, telling me to grab it quickly. So I did what the book told me.

We're celebrating Kak Intan's birthday tomorrow at some restaurant called Jimmy's. Never heard of that before. Oh. My. God. I just realised something. Tomorrow will be a family dinner. a formal family dinner. The whole family should be there. But that's not gonna happen. Why? My brother is in Miri, a'huh. Bummer. Tomorrow will be the first formal family dinner without my brother. I miss my brother :'(

Currently using a TRESemme shampoo and conditioner. Woot woot! It works like magic! It made my hair softer than before and it made my hair less oily, oh yeah yeah.

Nothing to update.

Chowzers.



Thursday, June 5
10:02 PM

Today was a hectic day. It was fun, exhausting, tiring, and really whacked.

Today's cheer practice was surprisingly fun-er than before. Well, despite the fact that my face got hit by one of the fliers during a basket-toss. My right cheekbone was throbbing with pain, and it's still tender if I touch it.

Oh, I didn't tell you the best part yet. About half an hour before the practice finishes, we had to carry back the thick, heavy black mats all the way to the gymnasium at the Form 3 block, which was all the way on the other side of the school. The black mats were in small rectangles and we had to combine them together to form one big mat. Oh, the mats are so heavy! You need two people to carry it. By the time I delivered my first mat to the gymnasium, my fingers were already numb.

One by one the mats went, from different pairs of partners, from the school hall all the way to the gymnasium. As I delivered my last mat, I came across a few of the cheer girls carrying a very very thick blue cushion-ish mat. So I decided to lend them a helping hand. It was funny alright;

Two of the girls were practically squished by the heavy mat, HAHA xD On the way to the gymnasium, there's this flight of stairs that we have to go through to get to the gym from the hall. Impossible. And as the CBNers call it, tangga besar, we had to go through THAT tangga besar. How did we manage to carry it up, you ask? Well, we had to turn it. Yes, turn. From the bottom of the first big stair, we had to flip the mat so that it gets to the second stair. After that, we had to flip it again so that it reaches the last stair. Mission accomplished, not yet.

Power up.

We had to flip the mat again. From its side, we had to flip it to its bottom so that it's easier to carry. It was so heavy! Finally we reached the gym. Some band girls were lingering outside the gym, resting their bodies after a tiring band-practice. As we carried the big blue mat, the band girls were watching us humiliating ourselves, HAHAHA xD We stopped halfway, put the mat down, and started laughing uncontrollably. I saw some of the band girls laughing with us too, or at us. haha. It was so funny! Even though we were sort of embarrassing ourselves, we felt sort of good about it. It was a hectic event :P

After cheer practice, I went home. Piqa tagged along and went home with me. We had this photoshoot for my sister later that afternoon, so Piqa went home with me to make things easier. We took a shower and got dressed. Then Kar Mun came along. She arrived at my house around 1.30pm --whenever my friends get to my room, it will always be messed up, haha--

I received the news that Sara couldn't come to the photoshoot. Unfortunately she had a last-minute friendly-match with a team from Singapore. Hockey. She just found out about that match that late morning, which was quite disappointing. hehe.

2.30pm. Kak Lea brought us to The Curve and started snapping pictures. I brought along my barrette with me. We really had fun modeling for her. hehe. Well, it would be fun-er if Sara was there with us :( But still, we had a great time!

Too lazy to type down the events that happened today. I hope you got my stories straight, I'm not really good at telling stories x)



Wednesday, June 4
8:56 PM

Bloody hell, I just found out that the government is raising the price of electricity as well! Oh I am so peeved.

Haihh...kesian la orang yang tak ada duit. Semua benda harga naik. . .

Mummy's one-hundred-percent correctomondo! Everything is getting more and more expensive. Last time, 10sen used to be like RM1. Now, RM1 is like 10sen -- well, to the bloody government, I suppose --

I hate this place. I want to fly to Chicago. Ooh that would be fantastic!

This could only lead to one thing; I should cut down on my expenses and my spendings. Great -_-"

You know what I think? I think we should take a stand for ourselves. I think we should do a strike. Yeah, strike. Since rice is getting more expensive, I think I'll do a hunger strike. A'huh hell yeah. I think I'll only eat eggs. That can fill me up for quite a long time. Yeaaahh

I loathe this country's expenses.



8:08 PM

I just had dinner. Yum yum.

I went to Midvalley with Kak Lea and Abah today. We did some grocery shopping, woot woot!

Oh great, harga minyak naik lagi. Even though I'm still not legal to drive yet, somehow this price-of-the-petrol-is-going-higher thing is affecting me. Well, technically I am a bit political, especially when it comes to money. Ha-ha. What can I say? I am being raised by political parents (not in a bad way) :D So, I guess my parents have taught me bit by bit about politics.

My family and I were discussing this matter during dinner. The price of the beras is higher, which means we have to cut down on what we eat --which is quite good, lose some weight, heh heh-- Plus, the price of the God damn petrol and diesel is also going higher. Bullshit, people! Bullshit! I mean come on! I know I'm supposed to love this country, blah blah blah dee blah, but serious shit I'm telling you, I don't really like living in Malaysia. The cleanliness and the environment is one thing, but I seriously can't bear with the government. They are the ones who raised all the prices of the things here. Ooh, the prices of sales are being raised, what about the salaries of every worker here in Malaysia?

Harga beras naik, harga petrol naik, gaji? Tak naik pulak.

Seriously dudes, this is getting on my nerves. This is why I want to whisk away my life all the way to Chicago, where the place is clean and I see no problems in politics at all. Hmph

"Malaysiaku Gemilang", chyeah right.



Tuesday, June 3
10:13 PM

I went to Kak Intan's studio again today. Still haven't been paid from yesterday's work, heh heh.

There is this easel, with a chalkboard, that Kak Intan puts at the entrance of her studio. And just now, I get to draw and customise the chalkboard with this month's updates. Woohoo I had fun! :D

I lingered at the studio's mini-office at the back of the studio. First I did the chalkboard thingymajinx, then I played Bejeweled 2 and Mystery P.I. Haha. (Psst, I didn't know that there was a wireless internet connection there ;D )

Tomorrow is Kak Intan's birthday. I'm not sure what to get her. I mean, she is a stylish woman. Even when she's at home, she'll have to look good. haha ;D Maybe I'll get her an accessory like a necklace or maybe a pair of earrings. Heehee

Chowzers!



Monday, June 2
4:52 PM

It's been a long time since Kak Intan gave me work to do. It's been months! The last time I did the data entry work involving her studio was, oh I don't know, December? HA! To be honest, I kinda missed doing data entry work. It's fun even though I'll end up with bruised elbows and tired fingers. Heh heh.

Earlier today, Kak Intan gave me a stack of papers, which meant it was time for me to work. I know I'm only turning fourteen soon, but my sister owns a fitness studio and had asked me to work for her. hehe. Plus, I desperately need money. Like I said, Kak Intan gave me work earlier today. All I'm supposed to do is to just key in the data into the computer and I'm done! My salary used to be RM5 per hour, but since I need money to pay up my cheerleading outfit, she's given me RM10 per hour! Oh yeah! And I didn't even ask for a raise :D

I finished the work in just one hour and a half. That means I'll get Rm15. heh heh. Which also reminds me, I need to pay back Abg Hafiz for buying me that sling bag at the bazaar the other day. That bag costs RM25. And since I'll get RM15 from Kak Intan and I have another RM10 in my piggy bank, that means I have enough money to pay back Abg Hafiz. Thank God. hehe.

Doing this data entry work kinda brings me back to the old times last year. I really missed this :)

Oh look! It's raining outside, and it's apparently sunny! How rare.

Adios amigos.



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